There are periods in my life where I feel stuck. Bored. Antsy, if you will. When I sense this feeling of unease approaching I think about why it is I'm feeling this way. What's causing this caged consciousness? What can I do to improve it? What positive aspects can I bring to this roller coaster of life?
At this point I feel like there are numerous roads my life can take. This road could take me here. But THIS road could take me HERE. Then again, Road #3 could take me here. One of my biggest fears is picking a direction to go and it doesn't work out. It doesn't go the way it should have and it all blows up in my face. This is something that has stopped me from going anywhere at all. The result: Stuck. This is my own fault, I know. I am learning slowly but surely that I am the only person holding myself back.
So Readers, how do I know which path, road, direction, what-have-you to take? Is it all chance? Russian Roulette? Do I choose the easiest choice? The most direct? The most challenging? What about the riskiest? HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW?! If any of you have the secret, please let me in on it...Please?
How can I conquer this fear of failure? I suppose the easy answer is to just throw caution to the wind and go for it. But what if this...what if that...? What if...
Those are great questions and I can relate to the dilemma, as someone who has taken different roads and is only (at almost 50...) getting ready to start a new professional career... My suggestion: the most important is enjoying the road and the journey. Maybe it will not lead where you were expecting it would. But since you felt alive, vibrant and felt you were growing as you were travelling on it, it was worth it. It will be time and experience well spent. I have spent 10 years of my life becoming a lawyer and working as a lawyer... then realized that I was not enjoying this work. In a way it was a failure. On the other hand, I have learned a way of processing thoughts and reasoning, I gathered experience that I am still using in more spiritual (and fun....) fields. People with creativity and a natural curiosity like you (and me ;-) can't help have interesting lives. Channeling the many interests and picking the right ones to focus on can be a challenge. Focus on how you feel when you turn to this interest, what makes you happy and fully "you". That's a start! Bon courage...
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